Dear Rita,

I am 24 years old, I just finished my master’s program and I am feeling lost. A lot of my friends have already figured out exactly what they want to do and who they want to be. Meanwhile, I am bouncing from student job to student job while I am trying to figure out which career I want to make work. 

As far back as I can remember, I have been doing the right thing, getting good grades and following the “rules” for “how to have the perfect life”. I now find myself with a Masters degree in fine arts and nothing to show for it. I thought I wanted to work in a gallery but that requires a move, as I live in a smaller town with zero galleries to choose from. Now, I am leaning more towards staying put and becoming an art teacher. There is nothing wrong with that but to me it feels like my dreams are slowly disappearing. Honestly speaking, I am not making moves towards either career goal at the moment and just feeling stuck and scarily content working at a fast food restaurant in town. 

As someone who has been a high achiever throughout my life and my schooling, I assumed it would be easier to move into my dream job after graduation and the struggle is throwing me off and rendering me unable to make a concerted move towards my future goals. 

Have I failed if my career path does not look the way I imagined it would? And how do I move forward when I no longer feel certain about what I want?

Sincerely, 

Stuck in a Quarter Life Crisis

---

Dear Stuck, 

At 24 life may seem like it is passing you by but when you get to be my age doll, you realize that it’s but a blip of time in the grand scheme of things. However, I understand that me saying this is less than helpful advice. It is, though, a gentle reminder that you have time my dear. So let’s dig into the real problem here. 

You are measuring your success against your friends and baby, we have all been there. Hell, my first marriage was a product of wanting to do even just one thing like my peers (the second and third are different stories). I don’t recommend this path for you at all. Finding yourself in your 20’s can feel like an impossibly daunting task and most of the time it is. You are somewhere between a child and an adult, all the responsibility, none of the experience. What I want to say to you is slow down and take a breath. It’s ok to not have anything figured out at 24 and frankly my dear, it’s going to make you a hell of a lot more interesting as a human. 

What I am hearing is that you love art and your dream was to become a gallerist. What I will ask you sweetpea is, are you giving up on that dream because of your circumstances or is it truly no longer your dream? If it’s the former here is what I would do. I would go to local art schools, or even get on social media and find artists in your area and create community art events with them. Maybe chalking up a park sidewalk and creating an outdoor exhibition or using the local high school gym to put on a show. This will help if you decide to return to curation as a career path but whatever the outcome, it sounds like art is your passion and being surrounded by it will make you feel better. 

As for your question about failure, you have absolutely not failed because at 24 your life doesn’t look like what you imagined. If anything, it means you are succeeding, even if it doesn’t feel like it. This time if for figuring it out and what luck you have to be in the weeds with no career to distract you. Working at a fast food restaurant or in a supermarket is hard work and you can learn a lot about how to interact with customers, the business side of things and these things will serve you in your future career. 

Stuck, I want you to really hear me when I say this. You are exactly where you need to be. Use your master’s in fine arts to get creative to help you get out of this rut or at least to minimally get your hands into your passion again. You’ll get there doll, it just takes time which you have plenty of. Oh and please Stuck, have some fun. Life is too short to not have a little (of a lot of) (responsible) fun!

—- Rita Fairchild

The author is not a trained professional and the above advice is for entertainment purposes only. All names and identifying information have been changed to protect privacy. The opinions expressed in this column are solely those of the author and do not reflect the views or opinions of Osé Magazine or Osé Omni Media.